Disillusionment, Harry Potter, and Campsickness

Yay. I'm back.

Well, not really a "yay". I mean, it was awesome to get my grubby little hands on the new Harry Potter book (which is EXCELLENT, Snape is my hero)--not to mention taking an actual shower and sleeping in my own bed--but as is always the case with camp... I don't ever want to leave.

It sucks, this campsickness, it really does. I mean, with homesickness, you know you'll have to return eventually, that you will see the same people you always do once you return. However, the same does not hold true with camp. You can never be sure of when (or if) you'll be able to come back, or who you'll see again. Much like high school, I suppose, but I don't want to get started about that.

Also, things are looking a little better for my nonexistent love life in the idea that I think I am beginning to (God, I hate this phrase) "get over" Sean, who I chatted about last time, I believe. I'm not quite sure what happened, but I think my feelings are starting to relinquish their hold...not that I didn't think about him when I was away, of course I did. Especially when some of the other girls all started talking about their boyfriends...I generally like to steer clear of that sort of talk, and with good reason: I tend to be extremely bitter.

Anyway, here's a poem I wrote while I was at camp, dedicated to all my little buddies:

"Bunkmates"

Mixed up, inside out.

Not exactly sure what to

Think, feel, say.

I never want this dream to

End, this step back up and

Away from "reality", from

"Real" life. Verses slipping

From my cynical tongue,

Emotions rolling from my

Unfeeling fingers...

The first time I've written

In quite a long time. Tears

Streaming unchecked--not

Exactly composed, but it

Works--and I have

No other way to express how

I feel excepting the tight

Embrace, the watery glance,

The calls goodbye. And yet,

As we fly our separate ways

Over lands we've traveled

Together so many times in

Out two weeks that have felt

Like heaven, like complete, blissful

Eternity, I realize that though we

Might be separated, it is never quite

Goodbye.

© dark-hearted rose, 2007. All rights reserved. May not be duplicated without the express permission of author.